So this is upposed to be THE defining profile of Bill Simmons. This blog would not exist without Bill Simmons. Neither would Deadspin (which linked me to it), Barstool (which my friends talk about more than any other piece of current pop culture) or any of the the other myriad sports/pop culture writers, Web sites, and shows out there. Love him or hate him, the guy changed the game. Bill Simmons used to fuck guys like you in prison. Read this.