Here's how to cook a whole pig written by some 26-year-old chick that got hired to write a regular column for Esquire called "Eat Like a Man". I will now proceed to slam my head into a coffee table until I wake up and it's tomorrow.
Showing posts with label cooking. Show all posts
Showing posts with label cooking. Show all posts
Sunday, July 24, 2011
"How to Roast a Pig" by Elizabeth Gunnison - Esquire.com
Can anybody find me a goddam apartment in brooklyn? One bedroom in wburg, greenpoint, or dumbo. $2650 is the rent limit and I need outdoor space so my girlfriend can grow delicious herbs that I put in sauces and cocktails. Is that too much to ask? Brooklyn is on some real bullshit right now. Some real bullshit.
Monday, July 18, 2011
"The Man Who Will Cook You Anything" by Adam K. Raymond - Esquire.com
Some carnie out in Cali will cook any animal he can get his small disgusting carnie hands on for you. Lion, maggot, gator, it doesn't matter to this dude. And really it shouldn't matter to you.* Meat is meat is meat. I ate a live conch dick the other day. No big deal. I'm not trying to brag. I'm just tough like that. "Hey kid you want some conch dick? " he says. "Sure," I say. And slurp that shit down. Tastes like salty spaghetti. Also immediately got hard. It's basically natures Viagra.
But my boner is neither here nor there you sick animals so stop thinking about it. All I'm trying to say to you, is I will slap some Frank's hot sauce on a black bear burger and wolf it down so fast it'll make your head spin, and that's all I know.
*Except maggots. People who eat maggots are worthless.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
"My Mom Couldn't Cook" by Tom Junod - Esquire.com
This piece from Esquire came out a while ago and was just nominated for a James Beard award, which is kind of a big deal in the magazine world. Very well written, it traces the author's deft cooking skills back to the fact that his mom sucked in the kitchen so his dad did all the cooking. Now Tom Junod cooks (and writes) like a man.
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