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Tuesday, November 15, 2011

"The 2011-12 College Football All-Name Team" by Shane Ryan - Grantland.com

This article is flat-out hilarious. People name their sons some stupid shit. Like, when I think stupid names in sports, I immediately think of lacrosse. In fact, just for kicks, I'm going to go to the 2011 UVA lacrosse roster right now and pick the three stupidest names I can find. (Swear to God I didn't look at this roster before.)

'Scuse me for a second ... Steele Stanwick, Mark Cockerton (!), and Rhody Heller. Just fantastic. Honestly, it's a great game to play if you're bored and looking for a laugh. Look up any big time lacrosse school and the names are just ridiculous. Always.

That being said, and I hope this doesn't come across racist, but the shit cuts both ways, maybe even deeper for black dudes. Because for every Cockerton, Rhody, and Steele swaggering around the Little League-dropout* circuit, there is a Barkevious Mingo, HaHa Clinton-Moore, and Philander Moore just tearing up the Gridiron.

This article is absolutely ridiculous. A Poop Reads must read. Stamped, mark it down, done.

*Only Little League dropouts play lax. Lacrosse: the sport for kids who can't hit curveballs.


Dallas Butts!!!

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